‘Once Upon an Amateur Mom’ Turns Imperfect Parenting into Unforgettable Moments

The kitchen timer screamed whilst flour coated every surface, the baby wailed from his high chair and the eldest child announced she’d forgotten her science project was due tomorrow.

In that moment of beautiful chaos, Renee Thomas Hawkley realised something profound: these are the moments her children would remember forever.

It’s a scene that could happen in any family home, yet it captures something essential about motherhood that Renee explores in her new book, Once Upon an Amateur Mom. The question she poses isn’t how to achieve parenting perfection – it’s why we remember the messy moments most vividly, and what that tells us about what truly matters.

The Mother Behind the Stories

Renee Thomas Hawkley brings a unique perspective to parenting wisdom. As a former elementary school teacher with a master’s in literacy, she understands child development from a professional standpoint. But it’s her lived experience as a mother of eight children, raised across six states and two countries – from Utah to the Philippines – that gives her stories their authentic resonance.

She and her husband Dan, a retired military judge and officer in the U.S. Air Force, have navigated the complexities of raising a large family whilst adapting to different cultures and frequent relocations. This isn’t theoretical parenting advice; these are hard-won insights from someone who’s been in the trenches of family life for decades.

Her first book, Don’t Come in Here! Mom’s Throwing Spaghetti!, established her voice as refreshingly honest about family chaos. Now, Once Upon an Amateur Mom builds on that foundation with an exploration of how ordinary moments create extraordinary memories.

Finding Joy in the Ordinary Chaos

The book draws from Renee’s popular ‘Mother’s Minutes’ newspaper columns, magazine features and heartfelt letters – a collection of real-life reflections spanning years of parenting discoveries. Each vignette offers something familiar: the kitchen disaster that becomes a family legend, the bedtime routine that turns into an impromptu dance party, the school morning that goes completely sideways yet somehow works out.

What emerges is a mix of wit and wisdom touching on both hilarious disasters and quiet moments. Renee doesn’t shy away from the reality that modern motherhood brings unique challenges, but she finds beauty in the improvisation that defines family life.

‘As mothers, we are the keepers of moments,’ Renee reflects. ‘Our work may seem ordinary, but it builds the extraordinary.’

This philosophy runs throughout the book – that the seemingly mundane acts of motherhood create the foundation for lifelong connections. The burnt dinner that leads to a spontaneous picnic on the floor. The failed attempt at a perfect birthday party that becomes the most talked-about celebration. The late-night conversations that happen because bedtime didn’t go according to plan.

Why Amateur Moments Feel So Right

There’s something deeply comforting about Renee’s embrace of parenting as perpetual improvisation. In a world where social media presents curated versions of family life, her openness about feeling like she’s ‘winging it’ offers liberation for mothers who question their every decision.

The book acknowledges what many parents feel but rarely admit: that even with years of experience, you can still feel like you’re making it up as you go along. This isn’t a failure of parenting – it’s the very essence of it. Each child is different, each stage brings new challenges, and the moments that test us most often become the stories we treasure.

Renee captures this beautifully in her ‘Mother’s Creed,’ featured in the book: ‘My words and deeds, though small, will one day eclipse those of governments and kingdoms. My achievement will endure when even time is a memory; for I am a mother.’

It’s a powerful reminder that the work of motherhood, though often invisible, shapes the future in the most fundamental way possible. The relationship between parents and children extends far beyond any single moment or decision.

Connecting Past, Present and Future

One of the most compelling themes in Once Upon an Amateur Mom is how motherhood links generations. Renee’s stories blend humour and nostalgia, reminding us that the challenges we face today echo those our own mothers navigated, and that our responses will influence how our children approach their future families.

Her perspective, shaped by raising children across different cultures and decades, offers a unique view of how parenting fundamentals remain constant even as circumstances change. The specific technologies and social pressures may evolve, but the core experience of trying to raise good humans whilst maintaining your sanity remains remarkably consistent.

This generational perspective adds depth to her storytelling. She writes not just as a mother in the moment, but as someone who can see the longer arc of family life – how the toddler tantrum becomes a family joke, how the teenager’s rebellion transforms into adult independence, how the chaotic years give way to relationships built on shared laughter.

The Power of Imperfect Memories

Recent research supports what Renee instinctively understands: children don’t remember the perfect moments as vividly as the authentic ones. The candid, unguarded moments often leave the deepest impression, creating the stories that bind families together across time.

Her book celebrates these imperfect memories – the Christmas morning when the tree fell over, the family holiday where everything went wrong but everyone laughed until they cried, the ordinary Tuesday when someone said something that became a family catchphrase.

These stories resonate because they’re true to the actual experience of family life rather than the idealised version we sometimes feel pressured to create. They remind us that life is imperfect, but that meaning comes from how we navigate that imperfection together.

A Gentle Revolution in Parenting Wisdom

Once Upon an Amateur Mom represents a thoughtful shift in how we think about parenting success. Rather than measuring ourselves against impossible standards or feeling guilty about our mistakes, Renee invites us to embrace the amateur moments as exactly where we’re meant to be.

Her message is both simple and profound: motherhood links generations through love and the small moments that shape lives. The work isn’t in achieving perfection – it’s in showing up authentically, finding joy in the chaos, and trusting that our children will remember the love more clearly than the mistakes.

Whether you’re a seasoned parent or just beginning your journey, this collection offers a refreshing perspective on what makes family life meaningful. It’s not the picture-perfect moments that matter most – it’s the real, messy, beautiful moments where love shows up imperfectly but completely, free from the claws of perfectionism.

After all, the burnt dinner that leads to ordering pizza and eating it on the living room floor might just become the evening your child remembers as the night Mum made everything an adventure. In a world that often makes parenting feel overwhelming, Renee’s wisdom reminds us that the chaos itself might be exactly what our children need to remember.